Monday, December 31, 2012

"I'm Sooo Upset!!"




Have you ever felt this way? I have, and I don’t enjoy the feeling. It’s like I get so frustrated sometimes and get that feeling that I can’t stand. Sometimes it is when I feel crazy or come across situations I can’t control. Or maybe, like in more recent cases, I get upset when my ex provokes, or prowls into my world through a random text, an accusation, or a continued lie.

I thought I was all over with the feelings of anger after ending the marriage, but I find myself still needing to deal with the sin nature, and in particular the emotion of anger and bitterness.

Towards the end of my married life, I had become someone I did not know. I was angry. I was angry that I was in the situation I was in; angry that I couldn’t be enough for my husband to want only me; upset that I had to be alone; and resentful for all of it. This anger and bitterness came out of my mouth, my actions, and my emotions. Although I thought I had the majority of this anger under control, the underlying anger had rooted inside of me, and was taking its toll on me- physically and emotionally.

So now when I have those encounters and I feel the anger and bad memories arise in me, I try to take note of what the issue was that made me feel mad and figure out a way to work through it, as to not have the angry feeling about that particular thing again.
 
I know that there will be potential frustration in the future, but it will be my choice on how I allow it to affect me. As far as my ex anger goes, I still pray and hope that the love will eventually fade so that I will not continue to be hurt over and over, and I will no longer be concerned with anything that could negatively affect me.

What are your thoughts about this or how you have handled anger or hurt or bitterness?

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